party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
