i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize