pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
