I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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