Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
