he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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