YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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