I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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