i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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