Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.

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  (503): and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath. http://tfl.nu/qhij
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again

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  (617): you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again http://tfl.nu/3f6n
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"

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  (603): your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers" http://tfl.nu/lsqw
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.

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  (405): you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend. http://tfl.nu/xacy
  Replies (9) Good night (5529) Bad night (537) Order T-Shirt
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  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?

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  (+31): He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...? http://tfl.nu/se8t
  Replies (16) Good night (3855) Bad night (1354) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.

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  (913): his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up. http://tfl.nu/i0an
  Replies (21) Good night (923) Bad night (7887) Order T-Shirt
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving

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  (262): just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving http://tfl.nu/vnp1
  Replies (21) Good night (5473) Bad night (752) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping

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  (973): Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping http://tfl.nu/1og8
  Replies (21) Good night (4803) Bad night (1614) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate

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  (937): Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate http://tfl.nu/e0yr
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday

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  (318): There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday http://tfl.nu/53lu
  Replies (12) Good night (3177) Bad night (1009) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.

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  (504): All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup. http://tfl.nu/pyk9
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.

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  (816): He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance. http://tfl.nu/ljav
  Replies (5) Good night (2341) Bad night (1133) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few

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  (617): I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few http://tfl.nu/zw2s
  Replies (8) Good night (850) Bad night (1873) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day

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  (602): Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day http://tfl.nu/9htm
  Replies (10) Good night (858) Bad night (451) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.

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  (253): Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead. http://tfl.nu/ww0m
  Replies (3) Good night (786) Bad night (235)

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