I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize