I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I think a kid would responsible me up
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
