We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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