Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
