it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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