Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I bet he comes in French.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
