Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
