I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize
