): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
