can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Randomize