i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
