my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
