K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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