Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
