this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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