i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
