Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
