I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Randomize
