I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
