you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
