I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
The beer is more important than you right now.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize