Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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