Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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