It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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