rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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