I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
