just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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