Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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