Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
