He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize
