That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
