You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Randomize
