i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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