So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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