I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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