I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize