I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
