so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
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Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
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I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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