I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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