No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize