Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
